My favorite part of this photo is that there is absolutely no reason for Jason Segel to be in it and yet there he is laying on Seth Rogen
E E V E E A U T I F U L
i love how all of these are puns but the last one is all like BE MY FUCKING VALENTINE.
I’m sexually attracted to this Jacket
I have reblogged this before and I will again. Can’t get over this thing.
I should make this now.
I had two ideas for what I would get married in.
1. Pirate Attire
2. A cross between a dress and a tux
you have created both
Marry me in this and I will love you forever
oh my god what just happened
This is probably the most hysterical thing I have ever seen
thats what you call self defence
The fact that he couldn’t get his shirt off and then just flailed to the floor kills me
Forever ReOH MY
So we have an Italian exchange student at our school. And he and I were hanging out and he saw a pony, and he tried to show me but he didn’t know what it was called so he just pointed at it and said “Look, the compressed horse.”
And then he just grinned at his complete understanding of the English language.
that is the cutest thing i have ever heard
what contraceptive pills do:
- regulate periods
- prevent the development of ovarian cysts
- prevent the growth of ovarian cysts if they exist
- help with period pains and cramps
- help with ovulation pains
- clean skin from painful acne
- oh yeah
- help you not get fucking pregnant
- you know
what mitt romney says contraceptive pills do:
- promote prostitution and turn women into sex-crazed sluts
no but what if the guy who loaded the machine had just filled it with these
you get a polar bear and it’s a nice surprise and you put the change in for another coke
but you get another polar bear
and you’re like hm that was weird but hey i got two polar bears that’s pretty cool
but it kEEPS HAPPENING
OVER AND OVER
you get more and more frustrated each time
eventually you give up and sit down on the floor and cry, surrounded by small plushie polar bears
you’re so thirsty
you never wanted this to happen
all you wanted was a coke
how the hell did they fit the bear into the top of the bottle
When I was like 6 years old I was woken up in the middle of night by a voice saying “play with me play with me” over and over and I stayed awake for two hours terrified as the voice continued and then I realized it was a furby
That is literally the best reason to stay terrified.